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Still, if Wiseman wants to get into the giggle business, he should learn the first rule: Comedy is not pretty, especially if you think you're funny and you're not.

So here's what some real comedians think of Wiseman's research:

Comics Roast Egghead

"I'd have to politely suggest to Dr. Wiseman that he stick to his day job … We politely refer to some guys as a N.G.N.A — Nice Guy, No Act." — Eddie Brill, booker for comedians, Late Show With David Letterman "If the British are spending money on this, God knows what else they're spending it on … The joke isn't funny. It isn't even in the ballpark of funny. 'Two Jews walk into a bar without a punch line' is funnier." — Lewis Black, commentator, The Daily Show on Comedy Central "We now know why there are no rocket scientists — or any scientists, for that matter — on Hollywood Squares." — Dom DeLuise, who says the hardest part of working on Hollywood Squares is "squeezing your butt into those little spaces."

"This is a joke about a man who kills his friend. The really funny thing is that this joke wouldn't work if the two hunters were women. Now, I wish science could explain that."

— Suzie Essman, who's appearing this week in HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm and Comedy Central's Crank Yankers

"That joke is such a bomb, the government is threatening to use it against Iraq." — Jeff Gurian, comedy writer for Friars Club Roasts, Joan Rivers, and Rodney Dangerfield

"I could make that joke funny, but only if I used obscenities every three words." — Gilbert Gottfried, stand-up comic and voice of the AFLAC duck in TV commercials

"Sure, Dr. Wiseman can find the funniest joke, but can he screw in a light bulb? I hear the second funniest joke is his resume."

— Malcolm Kushner, speechwriter, author of Public Speaking for Dummies

"What's funny is that hunters don't carry cell phones. That's a stupid joke! And it's long!"

— Mario Cantone, stand-up comic who appears regularly on HBO's Sex and the City as Anthony, Charlotte's frenetic gay friend