By Buck Wolf

Sept. 28, 2000 — You’ve read the book, watched the video, and played the board game. Now America’s most popular recipe for a happy marriage has been set to music.

Get ready for a Las Vegas stage version of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, opening Sept. 28 at the famed Flamingo Hotel.

One can only imagine what legendary gangster and Flamingo founder Bugsy Siegel would say if he saw actors dancing and singing about their lackluster, co-dependent sex lives. Is this what Bugsy envisioned for Sin City?

Here’s a sampling from a number called “Dysfunctional”: Woman: He told me he was healing his inner child. Chorus: Child, child Woman: He showed such empathy that it drove me wild. Chorus: Wild, wild Woman: And as a woman who loves too much, I failed to see the co-dependency when we touched. I couldn’t tell he was dysfunctional! Chorus: Dysfunctional! Dysfunctional!

In another couplet, a woman croons, “There’s no joie de vivre in my libido.” To which her partner replies, “I think my libido has gone incognito.” In another, one man advises “Make time to please her,” only to have his friend retort, “Max out your Visa.”

What Planet Are You From?

It’s not exactly Andrew Lloyd Webber. But love guru and author John Gray must know what he is doing. Gray’s Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus was the best-selling hardcover of the 1990s, unless you want to count the Bible.

Since 1992, Men Are From Mars has sold more than 11 million copies, not to mention 2 million audio cassettes and 300,000 videos. It’s been translated into 43 languages, and even hit the best-seller list in Bosnia.

“There was war in Eastern Europe and people told me it was a sensation there,” Gray tells The Wolf Files.

“I think it will work on stage,” he says. “When I do my seminars, people are rolling in the aisles laughing. I can’t wait to see the reaction to this.”