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Among Kramer's friends and Libertarian loyalists were Simon Morley and David Friend, two actors who star in an off-Broadway show called Puppetry of the Penis: The Art of Genital Origami. These Australians twist their sex organs into the shape of animals, among other things, sort of like twisted balloon benders. Surprisingly, nobody seemed afraid to shake their hands.

Folks crowded around the bar, watching early returns on the TV. At about 9 p.m., Bernard Goetz, another third-party candidate for mayor, walked in. Goetz gained nationwide notoriety when he shot and wounded four black teenagers on a crowded subway who threatened him with a screwdriver and demanded $5. Acquitted of attempted first-degree murder, Goetz served eight months in jail for possessing a deadly weapon.

Goetz told The Wolf Files he no longer carries a weapon. But when he reached into his pocket to hand out campaign buttons, several people sarcastically shouted out, "Don't shoot, Bernie … I don't have a screwdriver."

Why did Goetz run? "I tell people there are 10 doofuses running for mayor, and I wanted my name added to the list," he said. His campaign platform was to let the popular outgoing mayor, Rudolph Giuliani, run the city as a deputy mayor. Term limits prevent Giuliani from running this year.

'My Life Is an Open Book'

As the early results were pouring in, the race between Green and Republican Michael Bloomberg was so close, it seemed third-party candidates might have thrown a monkey wrench into city politics.

But when the final votes were counted, Bloomberg took the election by more than 40,000 votes, meaning that Kramer's 2,621 votes didn't seem to make much of a difference.

"Hell, I had a great time," Kramer said, as Green made his concession speech.

He had promised, if elected, the first thing he'd do is get a haircut. Then, he'd buy a suit. "Now, my life is an open book."

Kramer ended up with slightly fewer votes than the candidate for the Marijuana Reform Party. "They have a marijuana leaf as a symbol. That's a pretty strong image for folks who would otherwise support me," he said.